This photography thing is a funny gig. I assume it's this way for many people, in many different walks of life, but if I'm going to be completely honest with you then I must admit that there is a lot of insecurity and doubt involved. There are days when the location, the lighting, the ideas....they all join forces and decide to cooperate, generating a feeling of confidence and creativity. I like these kind of days. But for each one of those days, there are other days when the wind will blow. April 29th was one of those days.
I arrived at Town Center in Sugarland, excited and prepared for my senior photo shoot with Sara. And then I got out of my car. No lie, the wind almost knocked me over. Not good. I know what you are thinking, 'don't they use fans and things to blow hair around when doing photo shoots? Isn't that supposed to be a really good thing??' Ummm....no. On top of that, apparently a nice breezy evening in Houston is directly related to an increase in shopping sales. There were people everywhere! Scouting out a location for the photos was definitely going to be a challenge. Needless to say, I was a little concerned about what kind of images I could produce that day. Sara arrived and was wonderful, we had a great time and we ended up finding multiple places to shoot but I still left feeling a bit doubtful...and, well...discouraged.
A few days after delivering the dvd of images to her I received a voicemail from Sara's mom. What I heard on the other end of the line I will never forget. I can't even think about it without getting teary-eyed. In the sweetest, most sincere voice I hear the words,
"Emily...you did an amazing job. I mean the whole cd, it's just amazing, I'm just in love with your work, you did such a great job. Thank you so much. I mean you did so good...they are wonderful...thank you so much from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much."
And at that very moment it washed over me, an undeserving wave of gratitude. A kind reminder of the reason I do this. There is joy and thankfulness in pursuing this career, and I think I'm learning that it's not at all about how it makes ME feel. And if I walk away from every photo shoot I ever do feeling average and uncreative, that might just be okay. Because average people can be used in great ways. And that truth and joy is enough for me. Sara, thank you for the fresh reminder of why I love my job!
Congratulations on your upcoming graduation, I hope college brings many blessings your way.